The Caregiving Team Phenomenon

I have about five friends in Fort Wayne who have previously assisted me with caregiving, and who were able to commit to helping with this summer experiment. Since I've known them the longest and they have the most experience, I call them the "original gang" - the O.G.: Pam, Rachel, Abby, Julie and Lori. We've done everything from sleepover parties to quick bathroom breaks in coffee shops to road trips together! And while I didn't want to depend completely on them for everything, I knew they would be incredibly important in helping make this summer a success. So the month before I moved, I asked them to pray with me for helpers, and also to start recruiting. 

As I mentioned in the last post, that is a hard ask, especially to strangers. None of us knew how it would be received. I reminded them that I don't need specifically medical professionals, just friends who were available and willing to learn. And thanks to the awesome travel lift that my dad made for me, anyone could safely transfer me to and from my wheelchair. 

Julie told me that she was pitching it more like a friendship with "this really cool girl she knew," rather than as a caregiving position. Abby and I talked about inviting small groups to do it together, rather than just disconnected individuals. Lori mentioned that as a "newbie," she felt a lot more comfortable learning with a more experienced buddy. So the ladies started talking about it with their friends, approaching their inner circles with the idea of a summer ministry project, and inviting them to come along with  them to meet me and see what it was like. Kevan and Katie also helped with recruitment by sharing the need with the wives of the guys who help Kevan with his care. 

Those weeks leading up to my move were emotionally tumultuous. I kept trying to set what I thought were reasonable deadlines: "Lord, help us get 15 helpers on board by the first of May..." "OK, at least give me enough help for the first week by the day before I leave..." Every time I got super discouraged and anxious, God would do something to remind me that he hadn't forgotten about me. One of the girls would call and pray with me, or I'd find out that someone new was interested in helping. But it wasn't coming together quickly or smoothly and I was running out of ideas. On the day my parents and I drove up to Fort Wayne, I kept thinking, "Is this completely foolish? Should I turn back while I still can?" 

As we drove across Ohio, my phone came alive with phone calls and texts... friends of friends wanted to know more about my care, and my O.G.'s wanted to bring people over to meet me. The next day, I got moved into the apartment and basically hosted an open-house all afternoon. My mom was able to show people how to use my lift, and we did a ton of transfer demonstrations for new helpers to try. I think I made 12 new friends that day, and my team grew to about 20! 

The first couple weeks were filled with instructing, explaining, learning and growing. I created an excel spreadsheet that broke down the summer into 13 weeks, with four "shifts" each day - morning, lunch, dinner, and evening/overnight. Then I created a group chat for all these volunteers and shared the spreadsheet with all of them. That way they could see the gaps in the schedule, put their names in the shifts they could fill, and communicate with each other about last minute changes. 

 The craziest thing to me is that the more we spend time together, the more these ladies invite others into the team. Someone will be signed up for a shift and say, "Can I bring a friend along with me?" And I love that on several occasions, I've even had ladies approach me and say, "Could I be a part of this, too?" like it is a special club or something. I did not anticipate such an eager and interested response, and it continues to bless me, and frankly, blow my mind. 

At this time, I have 30 women on this team... and it just keeps growing! Throughout this summer, I will share more about these incredible friends and how they care for me in wonderful ways. 

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