Being an "Influencer"

 Last week I got to attend a conference for work and was a part of a panel discussion about social media and storytelling. I manage a lot of the content for We Carry Kevan's social media presence... not particularly because I'm skilled or passionate about that, but because in my role of Family (and Community) Engagement, I find that one way to engage our audience is to be active online. 

One of the questions for the panel was "How to do feel about the term 'influencer' and the associated expectations?" Our moderator actually added this question after a pre-session powwow, in which all of us groaned at the mention of the word 'influencer.' In our culture, this is a loaded term, isn't it? It indicates that a person who is visible and vocal online is somewhat of an expert in their topic and is someone others should pay attention to... a person whose opinion and insight should influence the way you think, act, dress, eat, or believe. That person may or may not have valid 'credentials,' extensive experience, or relevant education, but that doesn't really matter as much as their personality: cool-factor, charm, or charisma. And the influence they have may be good or bad, depending on who they are targeting, what they are selling, and how they are persuading.

So I was thinking about how to respond to this question, and the night before the session I asked my friend Christi to help me process and sort it out. And she said something incredibly true and profound: "Everyone is an influencer, whether they are trying to be or not." WOW. So, I let that point marinate in my brain overnight, and used it the next morning in the session.

When the question came up, two people answered before me - two people with big personalities and big online followings, by the way - and both of them said they didn't consider themselves 'influencers.' When it was my turn to share, I said, "Well, I think I'm gonna say something that might make some people gasp because it is the opposite of what you just heard..." I repeated Christi's revelation, and yes, there were a few gasps. My nephew, sitting in the front row in his banana costume, proudly put his fist out in front of him and opened his hand, palm-down, and mouthed the words: "Mic drop!"

I spoke that morning to a room full of people with my same disability - all of us with some variation of asymmetrical bodies, muppet-like limbs, and power wheelchairs. I told them that whether they want it or not, the world is watching us because we look different and are a rare population. People are watching to see how we react to obstacles in front of us, and honestly they will very likely associate the individual responses they see as a stereotype of the broader disabled community. 

Do we yell about perceived injustices that may just be inconveniences, and demand things that aren't available? Or do we patiently take a minute to reassess and find a positive and creative solution? Are we rude to strangers, sarcastic to ignorant people, impatient with waiters/cashiers/construction workers, dismissive of our caregivers? Or do we treat others with the graciousness, dignity and respect we want to receive? Are we influencing other wheelchair-users to be angry, highly-sensitive people, or people who seek out and appreciate the thoughtful efforts and kind considerations that they receive? Are we influencing able-bodied people to steer clear of us and fear offending us or inviting them into our world to learn something new and see things differently? Every time we go out in public, this is the power that we have, to be used for good or evil, to change the world, one heart at a time! 

I shared these thoughts with a small community of disabled people, but really this is true for everyone. Consider who is in your realm of influence - your peers, your family, your neighbors, your students... whether you want them to or not, they are watching you! They are paying attention to your actions and reactions, and they will be influenced by you, and you have the power to change their world.